Ok, ok. I know it's been a long time since my last blog. I have been hampered by this achilles injury and it has thrown everything out of whack for a while. But we are beginning to sense that life is close to returning to some sense of normal. The big question for our life is what is normal? Know what I mean.
My leg seems to be getting stronger everyday. I can stand on my injured leg without the brace now and have even ventured to take a step or two without the brace. That is huge from where I was a couple of weeks ago. The Dr says to be in the brace with one crutch for just another week. Then I will be in regular shoes for 2 weeks on one crutch. After that I will be walking on my own with no supports. The big thing is I will then be able to play golf as well (full swing). :)
On a deeper note, I have been immersed in the book of Daniel through our small group study. Beth Moore is one of the most anointed teachers I have ever witnessed. One thing I come away with is the sovereignty of God and how his handprint is on every step or move of human history. It also gives me a sense of hope (deep hope I might add) for what is to come in the future. That Jesus is returning as He said and the Kingdom will be established here on Earth as promised! I think I have also swayed to be a "pre-trib" guy through the scriptural evidence we have looked at. (My friend Rick will be glad to hear that!). :)
I am also reading a very different book called "the Shack". It is really stretching me to see the Trinity in a different perspective and is opening my heart to the depth of intimacy that the Lord really desires from me. I realize that I run into some sort of a wall in my ability to grow deeper in my love and experience with the Lord. The book is a wild story of how this wall was broken down by the 3 persons of the Godhead...the Father, The Son and the Holy Spirit. Let me remind you...the book is really different. But it is really stretching me.
Ultimately I see the goal that we all should have is to grow deeper in our life and relationship with God. Then the relationship of love is what begins to transform us. That transforming power then causes us to think, feel and act differently. Why do we make it so hard? Lord, simplify all our hearts and minds to grow in you and let your life grow out of us into the world.
Amen!
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Monday, March 10, 2008
in process
It's monday the 10th of March. Wed. will be 3 weeks since my surgery. The surgeon said that by the 3rd week I would notice a dramatic drop in the level of pain. I give it to his great skill and the grace of God that the pain has subsided significantly. The leg is still very weak (go figure) and now the physical therapy will be kicking in to strengthen the leg and tendon. The atrophy of the muscles in my left leg is pitiful. Looks like a peg leg but I look forward to being able to build my strength back up. The normal proticol is to be able to walk full with full weight bearing 8 weeks after surgery. Then I will be in the Dr's words jogging at 3 months. (Paul Watson said he should tear his Achilles and get the same surgery because he has never jogged before).
So aside from some stomach issues from the Advil I am very encouraged today. I do have to admit that I will not miss the crutches. So I am back in the office full-time this week and will be back to preaching this weekend. I look forward to share about Palm Sunday and the Triumphal entry of Jesus the Lord into Jerusalem to begin the Passion week.
One thing I'm looking forward to is Mike in our church here is a State Trooper. He said I looked like I needed a lift in my life so he is going to take me on a "ride along" tomorrow on his shift. I am really looking forward to observe a guy in a totally different career. To go fast and to pick his brain about life in law enforcement. I asked if I can carry a gun and he said no. :)
Last of all I want to publicly thank all of you that have been praying for my recovery and healing. I am definitely on the mend and God has sustained my spirits through this particular storm of my life. The enemy has been very active at times but Jane and I have learned to pray and fight back in the Spirit. Jane has been a wonderful helpmate through this and we have enjoyed the time we have had to spend together. Gracie has loved having Daddy around so there has been a silver lining in the cloud in this venture.
God bless you all and we appreciate all your love, concern and incredible acts of kindness to us.
Kirk
So aside from some stomach issues from the Advil I am very encouraged today. I do have to admit that I will not miss the crutches. So I am back in the office full-time this week and will be back to preaching this weekend. I look forward to share about Palm Sunday and the Triumphal entry of Jesus the Lord into Jerusalem to begin the Passion week.
One thing I'm looking forward to is Mike in our church here is a State Trooper. He said I looked like I needed a lift in my life so he is going to take me on a "ride along" tomorrow on his shift. I am really looking forward to observe a guy in a totally different career. To go fast and to pick his brain about life in law enforcement. I asked if I can carry a gun and he said no. :)
Last of all I want to publicly thank all of you that have been praying for my recovery and healing. I am definitely on the mend and God has sustained my spirits through this particular storm of my life. The enemy has been very active at times but Jane and I have learned to pray and fight back in the Spirit. Jane has been a wonderful helpmate through this and we have enjoyed the time we have had to spend together. Gracie has loved having Daddy around so there has been a silver lining in the cloud in this venture.
God bless you all and we appreciate all your love, concern and incredible acts of kindness to us.
Kirk
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Moabitten
I just returned from our 3 day leadership retreat in Moab, UT. We had Cory Sondrol from the Canon City Vineyard come and facilitate us to come together and hash out how to communicate and implement a new vision for Canyon View Vineyard. Let me summarize it in 3 words..."It was awesome!" We felt the Lord's presence throughout our time together and came away with a deepened awareness that God is leading us.
The Lord lead us through times of healing, creating unity, and sending us out with a fresh vision and direction of where he's leading us. We were also able to find out what we're not. This will empower us to go forward with purpose and direction and not be so scattered with too many programs and events that are wearing our people out.
Now the work begins to finalize and refine that vision statement, to get buy-in with the rest of the staff and key volunteers and leaders in the church and our goal is to cast the vision to the church at large in a series of 4 sermons in September, 08'.
I have come away from our time together with a fresh sense of excitement and hope that God is going to do some amazing things through CVVC. This coincides with my leg feeling so much better and the pain level has really decreased to the point that a couple of Advil or Tylenol is all I need. The best thing is...no narcotics!!!
I have also come away from my injury and this retreat with a deeper sense of thankfulness for the new family that God has given us at CVVC. Yes we still miss our family in CC but we feel a deeper appreciation for what He's given us here in GJ. The outpouring of love, concern and service to our family has been unbelievable. I feel humbled and truly thankful for the opportunity to serve Him as the Pastor of CVVC. What an honor. What a daunting task. What a callling. What a joy to serve Him and to have something that is worth dying for!
May God's Kingdom come here on earth as it is in Heaven!!!
Kirk
The Lord lead us through times of healing, creating unity, and sending us out with a fresh vision and direction of where he's leading us. We were also able to find out what we're not. This will empower us to go forward with purpose and direction and not be so scattered with too many programs and events that are wearing our people out.
Now the work begins to finalize and refine that vision statement, to get buy-in with the rest of the staff and key volunteers and leaders in the church and our goal is to cast the vision to the church at large in a series of 4 sermons in September, 08'.
I have come away from our time together with a fresh sense of excitement and hope that God is going to do some amazing things through CVVC. This coincides with my leg feeling so much better and the pain level has really decreased to the point that a couple of Advil or Tylenol is all I need. The best thing is...no narcotics!!!
I have also come away from my injury and this retreat with a deeper sense of thankfulness for the new family that God has given us at CVVC. Yes we still miss our family in CC but we feel a deeper appreciation for what He's given us here in GJ. The outpouring of love, concern and service to our family has been unbelievable. I feel humbled and truly thankful for the opportunity to serve Him as the Pastor of CVVC. What an honor. What a daunting task. What a callling. What a joy to serve Him and to have something that is worth dying for!
May God's Kingdom come here on earth as it is in Heaven!!!
Kirk
Saturday, March 1, 2008
the coming light
Many already know that 2 weeks ago I ruptured my Achilles Tendon while snowboarding at the "White Out" youth retreat at Frontier Ranch. While snowboarding at Monarch Ski Area I was boarding down one of my old favorite black runs and fell. While I was sliding down the hill on my stomach the snowboard hit a mogul which caused the toes to stop while the downward momentum on the heals caused the tendon to snap in two. For some odd reason I couldn't put weight on my left leg and I couldn't navigate boarding down. So I took off my board and walked all the way down to the lodge. It was a bummer because it then started to snow profusely and I so wanted to be out boarding on the fresh powder.
So we come home on Monday and I tell Jane that we might want to have a Dr. look at my ankle. (I suspected it was the Achilles Tendon). So we got into Rocky Mtn. Orthopedics and sure enough - a total tear. So in comes this new wizz kid in the area named Dr. Mike Huang. He was trained at the Steadman ortho clinic in Vail where world reknown athletes come for surgery. He recommends surgery with this new instrument and it just so happens that he's the only surgeon in the area that knows how to use it. (I take this as a God thing). So surgery it was on Wed. the 20th of Feb. The surgery went fantastic and the incision is a mere 1-2 inches long. Amazing.
But then the dark period of the soul began. Little did I know that narcotic pain medicines totally wack me out. (by God's grace I have avoided any serious injuries my whole life). For all the activities I have done, that is definitely something to be thankful for. So the first 6 days of recovery I deal with this rash and itch all over from the meds. Then I become totally constipated (I know, too much information). But here's the kicker...I begin to start imagining and hearing things that aren't there. I felt like I was back in the 70's back on LSD. Jane began to freak out. (admittedly I was pretty happy because I felt no pain).
So Jane calls the Dr. and they change the pain meds to Vicodene. Nasty stuff! The first night that I was on vicodene I woke up in the middle of the night and felt like the walls were closing in on me and I couldn't catch my breath. I literally felt like I was slowly suffocating to death. It really felt like a demonic presence was killing me. So I woke up Jane and we began to war in the spirit. I walked around the house in my crutches rebuking the enemy and praying in the spirit. We put a Beth Moore CD on and I listened to her teaching. The anxiety and fear was still prevalent. So Jane got my guitar out and I worshiped for about an hour. Finally around 4:30 am Jane was able to get some rest.
But at 6 am I still couldn't get a full breath. So we called the Dr. and they sent me immediately to the ER to get checked against a Pulminary Embulism. So after a Cat Scan and EKG everything checked out normal. (go figure) So later that day I asked Jane to call Dr. Dan Thompson or family Dr. When he heard the news he said get him off of the Vicodene immediately and prescribed a regimine of plain Advil and Tylenol to manage the pain. After a couple of days the head began to clear and my spirits began to lift. I began to long for relational contact with people and began to sit outside and enjoy the genesis of spring here in GJ. (This is huge considering the long cold winter we have had here).
So in conclusion I look back over the past couple of weeks and can see that I was falling into a pit of darkness and despair of the soul. I was lifeless and despondent. I had no ambition and my thoughts were clouded. But now I am seeing that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It reminds me of when Zacharias (the father of John the Baptist) praised God in anticipation of the Messiah's birth, he also looked forward to a spiritual sunrise. Citing Malachi 4:2, he proclaimed: "The Dayspring [sunrise] from on high has visited us; to give light to those who sit in darkness" (Luke 1:78-79).
I am now full of hope that this too shall pass. I am on the road to heal. I am forever empathetic to others that are struggling with physical and emotional ailments. (much more than I was before this episode). I realize that even though the body is not what it was 20 years ago, my spirit continues to grow and look forward to what is to come of God's Kingdom. I am thankful for God's call to be the Pastor of Canyon View Vineyard Church. I am excited for our pastoral and elder retreat this coming week to refine the vision of Canyon View. Yes the Dayspring from on high has visited me and he has come to give light. I feel a renewed sense of hope and vision that the light is going to be shed on those in darkness in the years to come through Canyon View Vineyard. May God be glorified and praised for "all things". You guys rock!
Kirk
So we come home on Monday and I tell Jane that we might want to have a Dr. look at my ankle. (I suspected it was the Achilles Tendon). So we got into Rocky Mtn. Orthopedics and sure enough - a total tear. So in comes this new wizz kid in the area named Dr. Mike Huang. He was trained at the Steadman ortho clinic in Vail where world reknown athletes come for surgery. He recommends surgery with this new instrument and it just so happens that he's the only surgeon in the area that knows how to use it. (I take this as a God thing). So surgery it was on Wed. the 20th of Feb. The surgery went fantastic and the incision is a mere 1-2 inches long. Amazing.
But then the dark period of the soul began. Little did I know that narcotic pain medicines totally wack me out. (by God's grace I have avoided any serious injuries my whole life). For all the activities I have done, that is definitely something to be thankful for. So the first 6 days of recovery I deal with this rash and itch all over from the meds. Then I become totally constipated (I know, too much information). But here's the kicker...I begin to start imagining and hearing things that aren't there. I felt like I was back in the 70's back on LSD. Jane began to freak out. (admittedly I was pretty happy because I felt no pain).
So Jane calls the Dr. and they change the pain meds to Vicodene. Nasty stuff! The first night that I was on vicodene I woke up in the middle of the night and felt like the walls were closing in on me and I couldn't catch my breath. I literally felt like I was slowly suffocating to death. It really felt like a demonic presence was killing me. So I woke up Jane and we began to war in the spirit. I walked around the house in my crutches rebuking the enemy and praying in the spirit. We put a Beth Moore CD on and I listened to her teaching. The anxiety and fear was still prevalent. So Jane got my guitar out and I worshiped for about an hour. Finally around 4:30 am Jane was able to get some rest.
But at 6 am I still couldn't get a full breath. So we called the Dr. and they sent me immediately to the ER to get checked against a Pulminary Embulism. So after a Cat Scan and EKG everything checked out normal. (go figure) So later that day I asked Jane to call Dr. Dan Thompson or family Dr. When he heard the news he said get him off of the Vicodene immediately and prescribed a regimine of plain Advil and Tylenol to manage the pain. After a couple of days the head began to clear and my spirits began to lift. I began to long for relational contact with people and began to sit outside and enjoy the genesis of spring here in GJ. (This is huge considering the long cold winter we have had here).
So in conclusion I look back over the past couple of weeks and can see that I was falling into a pit of darkness and despair of the soul. I was lifeless and despondent. I had no ambition and my thoughts were clouded. But now I am seeing that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It reminds me of when Zacharias (the father of John the Baptist) praised God in anticipation of the Messiah's birth, he also looked forward to a spiritual sunrise. Citing Malachi 4:2, he proclaimed: "The Dayspring [sunrise] from on high has visited us; to give light to those who sit in darkness" (Luke 1:78-79).
I am now full of hope that this too shall pass. I am on the road to heal. I am forever empathetic to others that are struggling with physical and emotional ailments. (much more than I was before this episode). I realize that even though the body is not what it was 20 years ago, my spirit continues to grow and look forward to what is to come of God's Kingdom. I am thankful for God's call to be the Pastor of Canyon View Vineyard Church. I am excited for our pastoral and elder retreat this coming week to refine the vision of Canyon View. Yes the Dayspring from on high has visited me and he has come to give light. I feel a renewed sense of hope and vision that the light is going to be shed on those in darkness in the years to come through Canyon View Vineyard. May God be glorified and praised for "all things". You guys rock!
Kirk
Saturday, February 9, 2008
A worthy pursuit
In our Beth Moore study of Daniel we read from James 3:13 that says..."Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom." This is in contrast to King Nebuchadnezzar who erected a 90 ft. statue of himself to be worshipped.
The challenge is to find out what we truly worship. Is it solely God or is there false images that we create to worship. Images of success, of physical prowess, of intellectual pursuits, of artistic talent, of being "spiritual".
The test is in how we live our life. Do we simply live a good life and humbly do good to others? That is a sign of a life that truly seeks God and has no selfish ambition for recognition. Let us choose the life of a servant. Let us remember that the last shall be first. The key is to have a heart that pursues God first and foremost. As Beth Moore said..."Mathew 6:33 tells us that if we give our entire lives to the pursuit of God, everything else of value will find us. "
Join me in this eternally worthy pursuit. And through our life in Christ, let good pour out of us!
Bless you as we pursue God's presence together, Kirk
The challenge is to find out what we truly worship. Is it solely God or is there false images that we create to worship. Images of success, of physical prowess, of intellectual pursuits, of artistic talent, of being "spiritual".
The test is in how we live our life. Do we simply live a good life and humbly do good to others? That is a sign of a life that truly seeks God and has no selfish ambition for recognition. Let us choose the life of a servant. Let us remember that the last shall be first. The key is to have a heart that pursues God first and foremost. As Beth Moore said..."Mathew 6:33 tells us that if we give our entire lives to the pursuit of God, everything else of value will find us. "
Join me in this eternally worthy pursuit. And through our life in Christ, let good pour out of us!
Bless you as we pursue God's presence together, Kirk
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Dan the man!
One thing I've been jealous of over the past few years is how much Jane was learning from her Beth Moore Bible Studies. I would say to her..."How come this great teaching is limited to women?" So we decided to buck the system and have a Beth Moore Study on the book of Daniel with 3 other couples. We just had our first session and I just finished day 2 of my homework assignment. Wow! This is incredible teaching. I'm eating it up.
This first week I am so impressed with Daniel. Here we see a young man between 15-18 years old that is taken into captivity into Babylon under King Nebuchadnezzer and he stands up to the King and says he will not worship their god and will not indulge in their pleasures. He could have had it all. The choicest foods. And he says we'll stick with vegetables and grains. No Filet Mignon, no baked Alaska and probably no Sushi!
Daniel was bent on worshipping only the living God of Israel. He would bow down to no King but the King of Kings. THe question I have is would I have the same resolve? Only by the grace of God. What would I do if my life was at stake and someone said to bow down to another god or idol or loose my life? Only by the grace of God would I be able to make a stand and repeat the words of Jesus that you can take my life physically but you will never take my soul. I hope I would continue to choose Jesus...no matter what the stakes are. I pray that I can be like Daniel and stand up to the Babylonian tendencies in our world today. (Live your life for today. You deserve it. Seek all the pleasure the world has to offer you. It won't hurt you.).
The question for all of us is what is the world luring us into that may have a tragic ending? Can we learn to say "no" and seek God's heart and live in his will, no matter what the cost? Let's choose to be Daniel's today! By the Grace of God!! And all God's people said...Amen!!!
This first week I am so impressed with Daniel. Here we see a young man between 15-18 years old that is taken into captivity into Babylon under King Nebuchadnezzer and he stands up to the King and says he will not worship their god and will not indulge in their pleasures. He could have had it all. The choicest foods. And he says we'll stick with vegetables and grains. No Filet Mignon, no baked Alaska and probably no Sushi!
Daniel was bent on worshipping only the living God of Israel. He would bow down to no King but the King of Kings. THe question I have is would I have the same resolve? Only by the grace of God. What would I do if my life was at stake and someone said to bow down to another god or idol or loose my life? Only by the grace of God would I be able to make a stand and repeat the words of Jesus that you can take my life physically but you will never take my soul. I hope I would continue to choose Jesus...no matter what the stakes are. I pray that I can be like Daniel and stand up to the Babylonian tendencies in our world today. (Live your life for today. You deserve it. Seek all the pleasure the world has to offer you. It won't hurt you.).
The question for all of us is what is the world luring us into that may have a tragic ending? Can we learn to say "no" and seek God's heart and live in his will, no matter what the cost? Let's choose to be Daniel's today! By the Grace of God!! And all God's people said...Amen!!!
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
A new start
Ok, Sue. I know I have been tardy in my blogs. I have many excuses. Most of all the Holidays were filled with great family times as Wade was home for Christmas from VCOM in Boise. We cherished every moment we had together. We took a trip to the front range to see family and friends in Denver, C. Spgs and Canon City. It was a whirlwind filled with great fellowship, food and football. (I love watching bowl games and NFL football. It's a vice...God forgive me.) :) One of the blessings we had was going to church at the CC Vineyard. We saw old friends and enjoyed the worship and message from Greg Swearengen. But the greatest thing was the gratification we had to see the church doing so well under the new leadership. We were given the confirmation that God was in the whole transition to GJ and His hand hasn't been lifted from the church in CC. We gave our life to help build that church and it was another step in the process of handing it back to God. Jane especially had a sense of peace that she could now let go and embrace CVVC as her new church. God answered prayer big time in this one.
Yesterday we sent Wade off to Boise again. I had the best gift a dad could ever have. Wade and I went for coffee at Starbucks and we had a wonderful chat. We talked about relationships, ministry and setting goals. It was incredible. To be able to have such a deep talk with your son that is growing to be a young man of God was one of highlights of a dad's life. Thank you Lord! We all sense God has some great things in store for Wade.
Now it's back in the saddle at Canyon View. Overall we (the staff) have a wonderful sense that 08' is going to be a great year for the Kingdom of God for Canyon View Vineyard Church. My focus and prayer is for God to solidify his new vision for CVVC in the next 3 months. Then we will share it with the church at large in the messages in April and then we take off to expand God's Kingdom in the Grand Valley and the world. (The vision will be the focus of our leadership retreat that we will have the beginning of March in Moab).
In summary, I am very excited for 08'. I sense in my Spirit that 08' is going to be a year of great healing and new life in CVVC. Jeremiah 29:11 keeps coming to mind for us..."For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I embrace this promise, Lord. May you be glorified and may your Kingdom come...in a huge way in 08'. And everyone said...AMEN!!!
Yesterday we sent Wade off to Boise again. I had the best gift a dad could ever have. Wade and I went for coffee at Starbucks and we had a wonderful chat. We talked about relationships, ministry and setting goals. It was incredible. To be able to have such a deep talk with your son that is growing to be a young man of God was one of highlights of a dad's life. Thank you Lord! We all sense God has some great things in store for Wade.
Now it's back in the saddle at Canyon View. Overall we (the staff) have a wonderful sense that 08' is going to be a great year for the Kingdom of God for Canyon View Vineyard Church. My focus and prayer is for God to solidify his new vision for CVVC in the next 3 months. Then we will share it with the church at large in the messages in April and then we take off to expand God's Kingdom in the Grand Valley and the world. (The vision will be the focus of our leadership retreat that we will have the beginning of March in Moab).
In summary, I am very excited for 08'. I sense in my Spirit that 08' is going to be a year of great healing and new life in CVVC. Jeremiah 29:11 keeps coming to mind for us..."For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I embrace this promise, Lord. May you be glorified and may your Kingdom come...in a huge way in 08'. And everyone said...AMEN!!!
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