unbelievable!

After the shootings at the YWAM base in Arvada and the subsequent shooting hours later at New Life Church I'm left with a myriad of emotions. I had some associations with the YWAM base years ago when they sent teams to the youth facility I was a chaplain at in Lakewood. So my heart went out to the young adults that were victimized by such a senseless and brutal act.

But then there was the two young women that were killed at NLC. When I read the names of the victims it dawned on me that I knew the family. The Works family used to come and visit the Vineyard in Canon City. We even had them over for lunch after church one Sunday a few years ago. I tried to imagine the devastation of losing two of your children by one evil act. My heart is so broken for the Works family.

The last thing on my mind when I started pastoring a church is what we need to do to ensure security for the people. Unheard of just 10-20 years ago! But the world has changed so much. Since 9-11 we live in a totally different world. Lord help us.

So what do I conclude? I am resolved to trust my life, my family and the church in God's hands. For He is faithful and in control of all things. I am also reminded of the need to be eternally minded. To focus on eternity and not just on the temporal and unpredictable fallen world we live in. That is the only place where I can find peace that overcomes all the tragedies that may come our way. Thank the lord that we are eternally in His grip!

thorn in my flesh

2 Cor 12:9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.NIV

In 1990 I came down with a case of pneumonia. Then in 92' I had a serious case of High Altitude Pulminary Edema. As a result of this my lungs have become my thorn in the flesh. I have had prayer for healing in this area a # of times and by God's sovereign will, He has chosen to allow me to deal with this. So each year I come down with a serious case of Bronchitis and it takes weeks and even months for it to go away. It zaps away energy and hinders me from physical activity.

So here's what I have learned. ONe is to be smarter and accept that I am susceptible to this and take precautions to build up my immunity. The second is to accept that I have to slow down and get the rest I need to recover. Not that I'm "old" but I'm not a spring chicken anymore either. So I have to find that balance of acceptance and yet still have faith that God could heal my lungs at any moment if he would choose to.

The third lesson is to have empathy for those that have long-term ailments where they have no control of it. Healthy people can tend to be insensitive to people that have prolonged illnesses. Finally I have come to grips with the concept of dependency on God's presence and power to continue to function daily when I struggle with these lung issues. To find his strength carrying me through the day vs my own strength.

Can we truly be "thankful" when we suffer? I think we can!! May his power be perfected in all of us!

Pious?

In my devotional time this morning I had one of those..."wow, this is profound" kind of moments. Occasionally I will get out Oswald Chambers devotional called, "My Utmost for His Highest". Todays devotion was titled, "The Absoluteness of Christ". In the devo Chambers says, "The type of Christian experience in the NT is that of personal passionate devotion to the person of Jesus Christ."

So here's the deal. I had to think about my life and how devoted am I to passionately pursue Jesus Christ himself vs just trying to be more pious and act all good and religious. I have to say that at times it's all about just trying to act nice, to be considerate, to be good. But here's the difference. When we passionately pursue our relationship with Jesus Christ and are filled with the power of His Spirit, the Kingdom of God comes and transforms us from the inside out.

I admit that I know this. But it was like the HS was reminding me to not stray off course. To not get caught up into being a good and nice Pastor. But to be a man that humbly and passionately pursues a vital relationship with Jesus. And the beauty of life in the Kingdom of God is the Kingdom comes and exists within me. Then Jesus reveals himself through me! Let Jesus be glorified in all of us through His Kingdom in us! yeah, this is awesome!!

a wake up call

James 4:13-15
13 Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." 14 Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that."NIV

Many of you already have heard that my dad had a heart attack on Tuesday am. I was working at the office when my sister, Jan, called and told me she was driving to the hospital in Denver because our dad had a heart attack. She didn't know the severity of it but would let me know. Later she called and said he appeared to be alright but they had to put a stint in his heart due to blockage in the artery.

It was one of those sureal experiences. I was sort of numb and didn't know what to do but wait. The staff at CVVC were so precious. They invaded my office and came in to pray for dad. I also let the folks in CC know and they were praying there. Wade then had his fellow students at VCOM praying for him. Needless to say I felt the situation bathed in prayer.

Then Jane and Cory in CC encouraged me to go to Denver. So I quickly packed up and drove over the hill. So I spent 2 days with my family and focused on serving my parents. It was a good time to just hang out at the hospital and be with them and my 2 sisters.

But the verse in James kept ringing in my ear. It was a wake-up call to the reality that life is so temporal here. So I was thinking and praying about how God can use this to wake us all up to the lessons to learn through this. I came away with a deeper appreciation for my family and the need to truly cherish our times together. I also have a deeper sense of urgency for the Gospel to be shared.

I also had one of those Holy Spirit moments where I was prompted to pray for my dad's heart to be healed. The Dr. gave a shady prognosis and said 1/3 of the heart was damaged. So I told my parents about Karen being healed of breast cancer a month ago and the same God can heal his heart. So they were open to prayer and I layed hands on my dad's heart and prayed a simple prayer for God to heal the damaged tissue. It's up to God now!! Made the trip to Denver worth every moment.

The encouragement for all of us is to embrace every moment. To live life to the fullest. What legacy are we leaving? Is our life making a difference in a persons life for the Kingdom of God? A challenge for all of us, isn't it?

Bronco Blog

In watching the Bronco's game the camera would periodically show the fans. You have fans painted orange and blue. You have fans screaming and going beserk. You have fans raising their hands in celebration of the touchdown that was made. (Fortunately the Broncos are giving us something to cheer about.) I have to admit that if I was at Invesco field I would be cheering among the masses. It's fun, it's exhilerating and it causes you to sort of loose yourself in the midst of the excitement.

(Oh-oh. Tennessee just scored another touchdown). As fun as the Broncos are to watch (at least when they're winning), this doesn't compare to what I have witnessed here at CVVC over the past week. First of all the baptism we had two Sundays ago was over the top. 113 people getting baptized. Individuals, couples and whole families were baptized together. It was a time filled with joy, celebration and thankfulness. As I said in church, I was smiling so much it gave me a headache. I don't think my lips could stretch any further.

Than last week we heard of a woman that was miraculously healed of cancer. The Dr. even verified it as a supernatural intervention by God. Amazing! Next we had 19 people stand up and gave their lives to Christ. (Yikes, Tennessee kicked a field goal). So what I'm thinking about is in the scope of eternity, the Broncos don't hold anything over what God's doing. I really believe that we have no ideal what real celebration is. When we get to heaven (oh, what a day that will be), we will find what true celebration is. Celebrating the King of Kings, Lord of Lords and Champions of Champions. Maybe watching the Broncos is just a warm up for what is to come in heaven! :)

Celebrating with you all (Yes!! The Broncos just scored a TD!!!).

simply living

I picked up a book on John Wimber that I've been wanting to read called "The Way In is the Way On." John was quoted as saying, "All I'm trying to do is read the book and do what it tells me to do." I've heard this before but it was a refreshing reminder of dumbing down my faith to just do what the book (Bible) tells me to do.

AS I read from the book of Mark this week I was impressed with how Jesus sought after time with the Father. He woke up before dawn to steal some time alone with the Father before the frantic work of ministry began. Most people know I'm not a great morning person (I love my sleep) and it is work to extricate myself from the warmth of my bed. But I have seen that when Jesus got away to pray it was to refill his spiritual and emotional tanks from the challenges of ministry or it was to prepare him for the demands before him. Than he operated out of mercy and compassion. Ultimately his "oneness" with the Father was nourished through those intimate moments with the Father.

Lord, empower me to just do what the book says. Empower me through those moments of prayer that we have together. Help me to simply Love you and love my neighbor as myself. Help me to forgive as I have been forgiven. Help me to freely give as I have freely received. It's pretty simple really. Ultimately help me to keep it from getting so complex.

I'm just a mug

I'm just a mug. In the midst of an extremely busy schedule I fight with the tyranny of the urgent. I have continued to fight with finding a rythym of my schedule and finding the time for what is most important. I knew pastoring a church of CV's magnitude was going to be a challenge but at times it can be overwhelming. Here's the tension in all of this...I love what I'm doing. I am so blessed to be in a situation where I feel like I was wired for this by my maker.

This brings me to the point of this blog...I'm just a mug! Dave Blakeslee shared his "Potter's Wheel" message this weekend here at CV. It was incredible. Truly one of the most impactful messages I've ever seen. As he's shaping a lump of clay into a beautiful pot he's sharing God's heart. Amazing!! I was all dialed in on the different types of pots God makes for different purposes. For some unknown reason I do believe God made this little Oriental pot to be a "Pastor". For that I am thankful and feel so blessed that I get to do this.

But then he picked up a mug. It's one letter from mud. It's small and unassuming. But here's where God nails me...the picture of the mug being precious to the owner because it is held in their bosom filled with hot coffee. It is a picture of endearment...of intimacy. So the Lord says to me..."Kirk, don't forget that you're that special to me. I love it when we spend that time together in the mornings. Don't let busyness keep us from those moments together".

It wasn't a message of condemnation. It was an invitation. It was a reminder that God really likes spending time with me and was warning me to not let the ministry get in the way of
God ministering to my soul. I like being a mug. What are you?

(by the way, if you missed Dave's message, I strongly encourage you to get the DVD of the service. It was amazing.).

YL is the bomb!

Jane and I went to the YL Banquet at 2 Rivers Convention Ctr on Sunday night. It was the 25 yr. anniversary for YL in the Grand Valley. Due to the impact that YL had in my life personally, the evening blessed my socks off! I saw some old YL friends like JC Bowman (we dated some sisters in College and have been on YL staff together in the early 80's), Bob Krulish (was my Regional Director for YL when I was on staff) and Ashleigh Jordan (We used to mtn. bike together with our old friend Chris Wilson when we lived in GJ from 91-95).

One thing I cherish is since I have become a Christian, God has blessed me with friends all around the world (literally). I'm not the best to keep in touch with everyone but it is always great fun when events like Sunday night bring us together.

But the greatest gift of Sunday night was hearing all the testimonies and stories that were so similar to mine (when I was in HS). It reinforced my convictions of God's mercy and grace. Of how God loved me so much that he used YL to pursue my heart (when I was so lost). I thank God for YL and how the ministry continues to grow and thrive and touch the lives of thousands of HS kids around the world. To expand His Kingdom and extend His love to kids in such a relevant and profound way. God, continue to bless and provide the resources for YL to continue to reach kids throughout the world! Amen!!

Trapped in DIA

The oversight team from Canyon View Vineyard and myself went to Columbus Vineyard for a Building A Church That Works Conference. We're in between flights in DIA. I thought I'd take a few minutes to go through my emails and write down some thoughts.

One thing I have learned to appreciate is the value of building relationships with people that I work so closely with. I love to laugh with and hang out with these guys. The other value of going to a conference together is to have concentrated time to dialogue and hash through critical issues that need to be addressed.

I can only imagine what it must have been like to be like the disciples and literally hang out with Jesus for a full 3 years. To watch him minister to people. To hear his profound teachings. To yuck it up around the campfire. To watch him kick butt with the Pharisees and Saduccees.

No wonder they would say..."Where else are we to go (when everyone else left Jesus after his hard saying that you must eat my body and drink my blood), you have the words of life." So what I gotta believe is I have a deeper and deeper need to learn how to "hang out with Jesus". Maybe take some retreats with him. Maybe hang out on the back patio and dialogue with him. Maybe to read more of his words and let them sink deeper and deeper into my heart."

All of this church stuff can really become a barrier to all of this. God protect me from losing you in the midst of the ministry. What's keeping you from hanging out with Jesus? Busyness? TV? Worry? Go grab a cup of java, grab your Bible and journal, and go hang out with Jesus for a while. I think I'll do the same.

Challenged in Columbus

We're here at the Columbus Vineyard for the Church that Works conf. One thing God is speaking loud and clear to me is I have made an intentional shift from being the leader that needs to make things happen to a leader that needs to build a heritage. To build up other leaders. To shift from being the Joshua that is so amped on running into the battle with a sword in hand to being the Moses that blessed Joshua and sent him out. As I have to accept the reality that at 51 years of age I don't have the energy I used to but I have learned a few things over the 30+ years in ministry. So I need to give it away...continue to pass the baton to emerging leaders...to coach more and accept that I can't always be on the field playing at this stage of my life and ministry. I do accept this challenge warmly and am actually ok with it. This actually surprises me but it has began to settle in my heart. THe question that looms in my heart now is who to invest in, who to raise up, who's heart to speak into. God, I ask you to show me who the Joshua's are and invest in them. To be strategic and intentional with this. Amen!!!

Rock me baby!

It's the bottom of the 9th inning of what Wade used to call the "World Serious." As the Rockies are one run down, I still have a pit at the bottom of my stomach. In other words, I don't have much hope (especially the way their bats have gone so cold). Oh shoot...one out. But I have to wonder what is going on in the minds of the Rockies players. To get so far and then fall so short in the end. Are they still proud of all that they've accomplished this year?

It makes me think of the win at all costs mentality. (Crud...2 outs!). Think about this...we have this mentality that we build relationships with people outside of God's Kingdom to bring them in. If they reject Jesus, we take it as a failure on our part or we feel rejected personally. I love the new Post-modern concept of relationships that I got a picture in the wonderful book, "Chasing Francis." (This book is a must read guys!) Why not love people just for the sake of loving them? Why not be a friend for the sake of friendship itself?

This changes things from people being a project to being loved genuinely. (Aw poop! THe Series is over!!!!). This is my new directive for myself. Love people just because God loves them. With no other agenda. Food for thought, isn't it?

I think I'll start rooting for the Nuggets now. (Since the Broncos are going nowhere fast). :) I'm off to Columbus this week for a conference called, "Building a Church that works". I look forward to the time with my new partners in crime, Chalane Coit, Paul Watson, Les McPherson and Tim Mayer. Gonna be fun.

Rockies blues

One of the challenges of being a "pastor" is confronting the prejudices people have about you. It's so easy to assume that you're a different kind of person: That you live at a higher spiritual plain than everyone else. So here's a look at reality...I'm totally bummed the Rockies are getting blasted by the Red Sox in game one of the World Series. Ok, I admit it...I'm competitive. I love to win. I love to root for a winning team. And I hate it when "we" lose.

But this is one of the reasons that I love being on God's team. I love being on the side of light that always overcomes darkness. I love how Love always wins over evil. I love how the Kingdom of God is overcoming the Kingdom of darkness. I love that anyone who lives with the Kingdom within them has the future promise and hope of eternal life; Of heaven; Of the Earth being restored to its original perfect created state.

Then I won't have to cry over my teams losing anymore. Maybe I'll become a Red Sox fan. :)